22th April, Monday. I have received letter to be enlist on July 10, when I receive this letter I feel so afraid.. I am so afraid I will enlist into commando, because I really find that I still have a long way to go and I am scare of water, I dun wan to take the risk in it.. commando get to go more near to water and life of risk, but luckily I got a normal post, I had posted to tekong, hopefully for the 2yr of army I can finish up earlier.. Actually at the moment I am really confused in alot of things, but just dun know how to mention and sort out what I am confuse of, but I think in my mind is that I really lost will I marry her? should I stick to her? for the entire life will I be regret? I am really confuse, as what ppl always said love is selfish, I still got long way to go.. I really dun wan to put eye sight so short distance and for all the time my target of gf is those office gals with nice hair, attractive eye, x factor attitude.. but this kind of ladies always what ppl aim for.. and I am so sensitive.. I always afraid my gf or wife will got fuck around as now a day the world had changed for woman.. and my gf now although is not the type I am going for but she is very nice, adorable, always make me laugh, put in alot alot effort in this relationship.. so what should I do? I really dun know. But at the moment I just hope that this coming thursday exam for HI I will pass and quickly start on my foundation and will be successfully.. I got not much time to spend as I need to be rich before 29.

After transfer from North Point to AMK and from amk changes to amk bsx, I going to transfer to tpy bsx, I dun know is to happy or not to be happy, transfer over there being happy is I can talk to more ppl, wei bin, sofia, su xian, but one thing I think I am not very happy is that idiot laundren is there, from last time I dun really like this guy, he is so ya ya, always though he can do everything, working experience lesser than ppl but always wanna pretend he work very long, bolek eelin until now he is a third in charge there, just now still call me tell me he help me to change my shift from 12 to 5 instead of 12 to 6 on Wednesday, he is just trying to tell me he can amend roaster, knn pui!

Other than this thing, I got a very happy thing to share is I am already a FSC! Finacial Services Consultant (Insurance Agent), from young I always wanna be rich, I always hope that my ambition can be full fill. Although in this line I dun know whether can I become rich anot, but one thing had been proven is that ppl from there can do it without and high qualification, I believe I can do it too! that is the only chance for me to be rich, I must jia you! I left only HI paper I will be able to sell more product and also officially a agent! I must Jia you!!!!
I had passed my basic theory too for car de, I wanna buy car very soon!! yeah!!!

hm.. actually today something happen that make me very miserable too.. is about my relationship.. shi hui.. she today really make me so frustrated and miserable.. I really got the intention this morning to just said break up with her.. I really cannot endure her attitude anymore.. is going to reach a extend.. eventually I dun wanna meet her today for dinner.. but my mind keep flowing through what she had done and give in to me.. so I met her.. I am trying my best to love and dote her more.. I hope she wun ruin it and I hope I can maintain too.. I hope I dun need to make up a cruel choice in my life.. I really feel and think that I still got a very long and bright future waiting for me.. I cannot let it go just because of her..

This will be my very personal blog as I wun not allow anyone in my life to know what I had written here until the day I leave this world. The idea of changing from writing in my personal diary to this little blog here is because I wan it to be safely keep with privacy. In my life there is really too much things that happen and brought me here, so from today onwards, what ever what and how I feel whenever things happen in my life I will just post it here, sometime somethings I just need a diary to talk to because there will be no one I can trust to tell or talk to.